Isolation

Living my life in isolation
Heart beating fast
as worries and fears infiltrates every cell in my body
Feeling numb and exhausted
Lost in desperation...
What was once a world painted in colors

Shades of gray is all the color I see
As I lay in bed from night to day
Realizing I'm sleep deprived
Reminiscing the past
Of our giggles in bed reverberating in my head
Our tender kisses and hugs while feeling the release of oxytocin from within
Our nights out together felt like released butterflies
Love that was once flaming
As bright as stars shining
Slowly diffusing of an abandoned heart

Deprived of love and affection
I turned to him for comfort
Never knew things can change
the feelings I once had
Has now encumbered by the thoughts of us.

Now I face the reality
Isolation and prayers is now my comfort
Composing myself from painful memories
A heart once filled with excitable emotions
is now disconcerted by the empty promises

I now ask myself, what does it take for me to learn my lesson?
Am I still holding on to hope for any reason?
Holding myself hostage from my deepest fears 
To move on is not easy
So I pray for strength as I drown myself in tears
Pray that every tear running down my cheeks will be a blessing
Of God's favor to give me strength and peace
His pure and perfect love is all what fills my heart
as I weep and surrender all my fears

Even though I am a victim of love and empty promises
I don't have a cold heart in my body
Therefore Vengeance is not my strength
All I know is, I have loved you with all my heart
So forgiveness is all I can do
You had my heart....
All I can do now is take back my shattered heart...
I am done....  Farewell!
This is my closure to you